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Fiction Space Opera Skaven or S.O.S an AOS story in 3 acts.

Discussion in 'Fluff and Stories' started by Bowser, Jun 22, 2016.

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  1. Bowser
    Slann

    Bowser Third Spawning

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    This is for a story challenge over on the under empire. Kind of a fun one. The plot is a couple of engineers decide to kill the star lizards based on a guess that slann probably live on the space rock they can see in their telescope.

    Space Opera Skaven or S.O.S an AOS story in 3 acts.

    Chapter 1: Space Anomally or The Cod Piece That Transcends Space and Time.


    "Welcome to N.A.S.T.E.E Noisy Antagonistic Space Travel Engineering Experts. I am Chief Engineer Grime SpawnVole. Your name is Scum. Until you become big space hero. Then you will be living like a big boss. Warpstone and Does every day. How do you be big hero? Rumour has it that the Slann live on a giant space rock. We need to kill them so they stop sending star lizards to kill slay us."

    "When do I get paid? I really need want warpstone before my wife..." Scum started before being interrupted.

    "Yes yes, big pay. After. Go see Engineer Huge Stain. He will suit you up and show tell you the controls."

    "Grime SpawnVole to Major Scum,
    Grime SpawnVole to Major Scum,
    Take eat your warpstone pills and
    Put your cod piece on.
    Grime SpawnVole to Major Scum,
    Commencing Countdown engines on.
    Check ignition and may the Horned Rat not find your demise hilarious today. "
    "13, 13, 13, 13,..."
    "Huge Stain you idiot. That not how countdown goes. You need to say other numbers in a descending order." Shrieked Grime SpawnVole.

    "I only know the number 13. I didn't know there were others." Retorted Huge Stain.
    "Your calculations had better be... oh never mind, the ship has already lifted off."
    "Your mics are still on." Major Scum said in a slightly concerned tone.

    "This is Grime SpawnVole to Major Scum,
    You've really made the grade.
    The Clanrats want to know which clan symbol you wear. Now it's time to leave the capsule, hopefully you have some air."

    "This is Major Scum to Grime SpawnVole,
    I've been ejected through the door,
    And I'm floating in a weird strange way.
    And the stars look very threatening today.
    For here I am tethered to a tin can, far above the realm.
    Space is very black,
    I want you to bring me back.
    Though I've crossed lots of 13 miles, I'm feeling very still,
    And I think this hunk of scrap trash knows which way to go.
    Tell my wife the assassins are coming for her."
    "She knows." Replied Huge Stain with a tear in his eye.

    "This is Grime SpawnVole to Major Scum,
    The circuit's dead there's something wrong.
    Can you hear me Major Scum?
    Can you hear me Major Scum?
    Huge Stain, we have a problem. The cables to that circuit were solid. There should have been no connection loss. What could have happened?"

    "Well you know how when I get nervous I sometimes gnaw on bits of wire or cable?"

    "Fool idiot. I kept those with a current of 200 milliamps at all times. How did you survive?"

    " I think I was dead for a little while, but these extra hearts we had installed seemed to start up perfectly."

    "Well we did get it out into space. So mission successful. Now to keep one up there for more time. We need another Major Scum."

    Chapter 2: Rocket Rat or Deep Space 13


    They packed my bags last night pre-flight.
    Zero hour 13 a.m.
    And I'm going to be High as Thanquol by then.
    I miss my stuff so much I miss my knife.
    There's no one to stab out in space, on such a timeless flight.

    And I think know it's going to be long long time,
    'Til touchdown brings takes me round again to find
    I'm not the rat they think I am at home. Oh no no I'm a Rocket Rat.
    Rocket Rat plotting their deaths up here alone.

    The space station ain't the kind of place to eat your kids. In fact it's cold as a steel knife.
    And there's no one here to stab gut with a knife.
    And all this science, I don't can't understand. I just want to stab it. Stab it all. Rocket Rat, a Rocket Rat. And I think it's going to be a long long time..."

    "This is Grime SpawnVole to Major Scum 2. Stop talking about stabbing things and make sure the warp fuel pump is still working. No stop drinking from the warp pump. Bad Naughty Major. Huge Stain, send some zaps to his implants."

    "His screams are so angelic when I do that. Like a choir of pain."

    Chapter 3 Bizzarmageddon or You Didn’t Miss A Thing


    "Did you bring the Digger Drillers?" Asked Grime SpawnVole.

    "Yeah we dragged them back kicking and screaming as per there very odd requests. " Answered Huge Stain.

    "Ah yes, Mr. Hairy Stomper. Why won't your drill design work? "

    "How did you get that? I hid it in my most secret spot."

    "My spies are very good. They even check under mattresses."

    "How did they know? What do you want. We won't help you and your weird strange sky plots."

    "We can give you warpstone."

    "Our job is to drill for warpstone. Most of the stuff we own is warpstone."

    "Very well, do you see smell how the shadows move? We are prepared to let you live if you survive this dangerous mission."

    "We're untrained and have never used your equipment before. That's wildly irresponsible and idiotic. Why wouldn't we just fix the drill and you get your rats up in the sky?"

    "Don't be stupid, of course we will split you up into two teams and send one of our own pilots on each ship. What could possibly go wrong?"

    "Sound logic boss." Grunted Bear the Storm fiend, spinning his warp grinder.

    "Alright fine, but my doe pup Grease stays here and I want exclusive kill rights to her boyfriend mate, Always Jumpy or AJ as we call him."

    "Done. You will stop to refuel with liquid warp at space station 13. The Rat on board is an expert fuel guy. He is probably not too crazy yet. Then load your ships into this big slingshot on the space station. That will shoot you to a big space rock that we believe all the slann live. Drill in about 13 meters... wait, did you actually calculate 13 meters, or is that still the only number you know? Never mind. Plant this massive bomb and remote detonate it after lift off. That should kill off the rest of the star lizards."

    "Okay good bye Greasey. Be good."

    "Don't let anything happen to AJ. Promise me."

    I should have ate you when your bones were still soft. Got to get ready for blast off. Bye."


    "Grime SpawnVole to Hairy Stomper. Can you hear me?"

    "Yeah I hear you, we are almost at the space station."

    "Okay nice and gently, just slide it in..."

    "Skip the innuendo, we will be here all day."

    "That's what she said. Okay that was the last one I promise."

    "We're in, we're almost ready to be fueled up."

    "I am the Rocket Rat. Burning out his fuse up here alone."

    "Great, fill her up and then show us to the slingshot."

    "Ummm... I er just uh need to uh fix something on the uh fuel thing. Do you have a knife I can borrow?"

    "Here, take this one, I call it the Gut Puller." Said one of the N.A.S.T.E.E. pilots.

    "Hairy Stomper to Grime SpawnVole, come in. Your fuel guy went nuts. Just started stabbing people. It was pretty funny. Don't worry I don't see him anywhere, so he is probably gone. But now it's just me and AJ. So we are only taking one ship."

    "They're doomed." Said Grime SpawnVole.

    "This should be fun." Said Huge Stain.

    "Yes, let's get the big screen to watch."

    The cameras showed a twitchy figure with a glinting knife lose footing and go flying backwards as the slingshot hurtled he ship into space.

    "Did you bring snacks for the show?" Asked Grime SpawnVole.

    "I did. And let me tell you.
    I could stay awake, just to hear them screaming.
    Afraid to fall asleep yeah,
    While they're plotting and they're scheming.
    I could spend all night to see who gets put in a blender,
    I could stay lost in this show forever,
    Every nerve wracked scream is something I treasure.
    I don’t want to close my eyes,
    I don't want to fall asleep
    I'd miss the pain,
    And I don’t want to miss a scream."

    "You're a strange little rat thing Huge Stain. Oh look they landed."

    "Hey this is Hairy. I don’t see any frog things. I only see rock. AJ is digging down now."

    "Maybe the frog things stay underground. Dig harder you might get some with the drill."

    "I think he's far enough. Sorry AJ, you're like the Son I always wanted to murder to prove I was still tougher than young bucks. I left the bomb on the back of the drill. I have the detonator. I will say bye to Greasey for you."

    "Hairy. No. I was supposed to double cross you. I thought we were waiting until after drilling to do the double cross."

    "Yeah, I know I agreed to that, but then I double crossed you on that too."

    "Well you're quite good at this. It was something not like dishonour to serve with you."

    "Nooooo." Cried Grease. "Why did they both just blow up?"

    "Oh yeah we don't actually know how to make a remote detonator so the bomb was on a timer. Completely slipped my mind."

    "Well at least I have inherited enough warpstone and have the knowledge of enough warpstone veins to pay these assassins in the room to gut you both and live like a queen. Maybe I will just take over your lab. It's already set up with cute little logos scrawled on everything. Greasey, Queen of Space things"

    "Huge Stain we have a problem."

    "I hope they gut you first.
    I don’t want to close my eyes,
    I don't want to fall down dead
    I'd miss your pain,
    And I don’t want to miss a scream."

    Fin.
     
    Last edited: Jun 23, 2016
  2. Y'ttar Scaletail
    Troglodon

    Y'ttar Scaletail Well-Known Member

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    The sad thing is, that is probably how such a Skaven space mission would go... XD

    Very nice work, and cheers for putting someting up! :)
     
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  3. Bowser
    Slann

    Bowser Third Spawning

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    It was quick, and fun to write, and hopefully keeps the ball going, sounds like a few good ideas are jumping around, just need to get the people writing and posting.
     
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  4. Y'ttar Scaletail
    Troglodon

    Y'ttar Scaletail Well-Known Member

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    Aye, claws crossed about that. Hopefully with the upcoming holiday period some of the quieter writers on the UE might start putting pen to paw.

    If anything though, your epic reminded me of one of my lost short pieces which was a Skavenised parody of Captain Lockheed and the Starfighters. Had almost forgotten about that one. XD
     
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  5. Bowser
    Slann

    Bowser Third Spawning

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    Haha! Is that in the Under empire? Going to have to look for that one!
     
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  6. Y'ttar Scaletail
    Troglodon

    Y'ttar Scaletail Well-Known Member

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    here ye go, there's a lot less singing and more of the play-like scenes. :p
     
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  7. spawning of Bob
    Skar-Veteran

    spawning of Bob Well-Known Member

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    Fewer green M+Ms for you, I think, Bowser.

    And your headphones are confiscated.
     
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  8. Bowser
    Slann

    Bowser Third Spawning

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    Fine I will just eat oysters instead of M&Ms, and if you take away the headphones, everyone will just have to listen to my music.
     

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