Discussion in 'Fluff and Stories' started by Scalenex, Nov 1, 2020.
No worries mate. I'll let you know for the next time!
be warned i am at heart a lore purist. many of these stories are well written and well told but i am the wrong audience for it and fail them due to my own pedantic nature.
a place to call home the official trailer:
interesting framing device and a good recreation of modern movies. and why i don't watch movies any more. i have a feeling i would dislike most of XILIQUNCANI work. still very clever.
a scary day:
nice use of prehensile tails most people forget lizardmen aren't human and only use their tails or other lizard traits when saurus are hitting people with them. over not a lot of time to get attached or even to get to know the characters, there is the bones of a good story here but it needed fleshing out.(i like fribbit wish we got a description of her)
ah i have a feeling that if this story was about the elves or the empire i would be far kinder to it. but it is about our lizards and these characters act very little like them. cults are impossibly rare in the lizardmen past. so much so that we only know about one of them and that one was based completely in the old ones plan and was based on further zealotry rather then disagreement.
still good dialogue i am just the wrong person for this story.
the message begins"
love the opening pree excerpt a lot of knowledge went into that and i'm surprised by how much detail you can glean from it very nice(some one has read gaunts ghosts) . i am a bit weighted in this stories favore as this is one of my favorite types of lizard man lore. the out side looking in naturalist type of story says a lot in very little time and doesn't run the risk of making the Lizards to human. no real characters to get attached to but a good representation of lizard men and how the imperium would react to them. over all i would love to read more along the lines of the inquisition probing into wether or not these xenos could be useful or should be destroyed (and the methods they use to do so).
the path to salvation:
i like the idea of a krox rebuilding a city on his own. that is their purpose that is their job and even with out his leaders he continues his work. also a fan of the skinks final charge(bravery 5 my @$$ GW) people always seem to think skinks are cowardly when really they are just clever. they know they can not fight toe to toe so hit and run or ambush is their preferred method of fighting. BUT they always fight to the death when called upon to do so and there are more krox and saurus survivors of fallen cities then there are skinks.
im not sure if i like the ending kind of makes his work pointless but still good story and good portrayal of one of my brothers.
letters of the sea:
ok this one made me laugh. the idea of a lizard reading some lost sea mans love letters a thing that he would have no understanding of just makes me grin.and when the only thing he saves from the fire is said love letters, oh my poor sides. im afraid this probably spoiled what was supposed to be a sad story but i still enjoyed it even if not in the way it was intended
we all belong somewhere:
uh hmm not much of a story here so... no comment
mind of a hougerdon:
huh kind of lassy with lizards, neet. the herpetologist in me wants to yell about it but i've been told to be good so onwards
The savage beast:
i have the same problem with this one as i do with buried memories not a badly written story just not for me. i like the idea of all priests having one spell they use and can be sent where needed. i hate the incompetence not really a word i associate with lizardmen same with arrogance and a bunch of out of character parts. i do like the slann stepping in at the end but always prefer the need coming from being overwhelmed not from lack of ability.
[LoR's face assumes a haughty, holier-than-thou expression]
I make no claim to the pearls, nor can I own their shine. I can only admire them and proffer them for inspection and hope like a sunbeam forcing itself through an overcast sky to illuminate the ground below they can shine through the clouds of ignorance, prejudice and sloth.
"What's in a contest? A story by any other name would read as sweet"
"The Scolnex protests too much, methinks"
"What stories through yonder contest breaks?"
Shakespeare rewritten... and one from Yeats:
"But I, being poor, have only the contest; I have spread stories under your feet; Tread softly because you tread upon the authors."
@Lizards of Renown
Thanks for summoning me.
I'll try and write a short review at least.
Here we go.
1: Nice idea. I found it hard to read though. But I like the short descriptions of the scenes, they really conjure an image in my mind even though they are very short. That's an impressive skill.
2: This one is short and kinda sweet. I like it a lot. In the first half I kinda expected the crash landing but that the Slann would make it somehow. The moment the story cut was earlier than I thought and the author keeps open how it happened. And it works. Not bad at all and the last part gives that shimmer of hope that I like in stories. It is an end and a new beginning.
Nice job, and it fits the theme well.
3: I am not sure if I fully understand the message of this one. But I like the writing style. Carefully chosen words, especially those describing the emotions.
4: This one is full of 40k stuff I don’t understand so that kinda ruins it for me. I do like its form though, and the little things like the reference to the saying "only the dead know the end of war" or the description of the telepathic contact with the Slann.
5: This is dark and sad. It is nicely written, and it feels weird to say that I kinda enjoyed it although it leaves me pretty sad. Can't say a lot more, it is relatively straightforward.
6: This one is full of nice pictures. I also suspect that the author needeed an excuse to write cheesy love letters. I especially like the contrast between the content of the letters and what happens as the Skink reads them.
7: uhmm... I apologize but right now I don’t understand what is happening there. I must have missed something. I neither get what the Aelf wants nor what the Skinks is supposed to to. I fear I cannot see the reference to the theme either. It feels incomplete to me. I'll read it again though, when I have a bit more time.
9: I really needed this one. It is funny and positive, but still has action and typical Lizardman elements. The only thing that confused me a bit while reading were the numerous and quick changes of perspective. Nice story!
I like these last-minute mini reviews.
I like that there are some more reviews and voters in the last couple of days.
Also I think that we already know the winning story of the competition
It was very close 'til the last days...
I could call it officially, but we are less than 48 hours before the poll expires, so there is little point.
*Rides back in upon a blue flame wreathed horse*
Sorry about that, things have been crazy...Anyway...
Story Six: And now I want to play Don’t Starve again...maybe Shipwrecked...
Letters have been common fare in stories, so it is good to see a masterfully executed example here. The balance of letter to third person action was very well done, with only a few moments of disconnection that I felt here and there. Was the tragedy of the letters offset by the comedy of the lizzie accidently burning everything down? Maybe, though the poignancy with the end made up for it.
Green Seer Gnawtail, ‘Grey’ Seer: “Ah letter-scribbles. I use-used to send death threats and hon-honest remark-things to fool-Seer Cribitt, of course-course I signed Thanquol’s name-thing on them...”
Story Seven: I hope the author doesn’t take to heart their lack of votes for this piece as it was written to the exceptional standard you see on these forums. The descriptions were one of the main selling points of this piece, I for one adore using lighting effects via candles, torches, or stars to pattern many of my short stories. Those first two lines of this piece are utterly sublime. Thank you. I feel perhaps the main problem with this piece is the seemingly lack of substance and action, not that this is necessarily a bad thing, but in this piece it felt like something was missing.
Tox, of the Darkened Scale: “........Heh....”
Story Eight: And again another very different story. I greatly enjoyed the insight into the mind of the Huagerdon. Writing animals is always a great challenge as it is very very easy to humanize them (most lizzies can get away with elements of humanity as they are still Lizardmen but the base beasts of the jungles, less so.) I feel that the author achieved a good balance making the beastie more bestial in mind and yet sympathetic enough to be a little relatable. I’m glad the little fellow made it in the end.
Gitstompa, Sports Commentator: “Hurr hurr, dis remindz me of dat Grom Errwin’z natur show, dat stunti can take a lot of urtin’! I wish dat Ooo-ard-un woz more killy tho, dat wuld ‘ave been a rite laff!”
Story Nine: Transformation of Kadon is a fun spell. You know, after such a slew of emotional and dark stories, this was nice. The fight scenes didn't get too dragged down into themselves and the pacing kept me intrigued with how everything would turn out. I’m sure the new duo will achieve great things. I also really enjoyed the swap between the Skink’s words and the draconic rawrs that everyone else heard. Nice job!
Sliv Saltbeak, avian priest/doctor: “Hoy. A tale of little and large, it be easy ta take thar burdens upon yeself when in truth a mix of skills be often greater than thar sum of its parts.”
And with that my review-things are over. As always, amazing stuff all around! *Rides back off into the sunset*
Did you already vote?
I'm happy that @Y'ttar Scaletail reviewed all the stories.
I only miss @thedarkfourth , but i suppose we can't have it all...
But of course. And it was very difficult too.
I eventually narrowed my choices to three...and then umm'd and ahh'd and ended up changing my mind again...and again...
Still not sure i'm happy how I voted. Which shows a lot about the quality of writing.
The winning entry is "The Path to Salvation" by Killer Angel, thank you to everyone who entered!
Story One: "A Place to Call Home: The Official Trailer" by @thedarkfourth
Story Two: "A Scary Day" by @King Dust
Story Three: "Buried Memories" by @Paradoxical Pacifism
Story Four: "Message Begins" by @Y'ttar Scaletail
Story Five: "The Path to Salvation" by @Killer Angel
Story Six: "Letters of the Sea" by @Infinity Turtle
Story Seven: "We All Belong Somewhere" by @Imrahil
Story Eight: "The Mind of a Huagerdon" by Scalenex
Story Nine: "The Savage Beast" by @Lizards of Renown
I bestow the Scalenex Cup to @King Dust . It certainly milked the emotions via mourning the death of a single important person with lots of angst and second guessing on the part of the supporting characters.
Thanks again to @Infinity Turtle for coming up with one of the most intriguing contest themes we had in some time. A lot of pressure for Killer Angel to come up with something good to start out our sixth year of consecutive seasonal contests.
Did anyone not guess I was the one who wrote Story Eight? As the inventor of huagerdons I was the obvious suspect, but I put in a happy cute ending to disguise my trail.
Congratulations to @Killer Angel with your win!
and thanks all for the great stories I got to read.
Congrats @Killer Angel for the win. I thought your story was okay the first time I read it, but it progressively got better for me every time I re-read it to the point i gave it one of my votes.
Welp. I thought my story was anonymous enough. How'd you guess correctly?
Congratulations to the winner-meat as well as the entrants themselves.
Sterling work as always!
Always nice to read those stories.