Discomute you are much bolder than me. I'm much too terrified of Scalanex's wrath to post each review separately! Sorry mine are pretty brief this time - what a fantastic crop though! 1 - Well written for a monologue, and a fun idea. Ultimately the main character is too passive so there is no story. He should whisper to influence stuff - if it looks for a while like he's going to achieve his goals then his inevitable failure would be all the more impactful. 2 - Very strong, but a bit...bleak. If the good guy dies there needs to be at least a hint it was worth something. Could just be an acolyte watching in the shadows, who we know will get revenge in Act 3. Especially cos it's clearly an introductory chapter rather than a stand-alone short...would pay very good money to read the rest of this epic...and by "read" I mean watch the movie directed by Ang Lee. 3 - The in-story story is quite tense, which is good. But the overall story is mostly told, not shown. I'd like to be able to figure out the exaggerations without being told. And I'd like there to be greater stakes - maybe the crowd doesn't believe him at first and he knows if he fails to inspire them there will be dire consequences. Super premise though! 4 - I'm not sure which is rarer, a thunder lizard sighting or a happy ending in this competition! I enjoyed this story a lot, it's got a great structure, my only complaint is that it often tells rather than shows! Eg when he looks at his reflection we should be able to tell from his actions that he's making a momentous decision, not told so specifically. 5 - I like the scene, the demonstration and the ending. The theme really gets to the heart of freedom. I just wish there was a broader story in which we could see this theme being played out. It's always better to dramatise, not just debate! #brokenrecordsorry 6 - Wonderful! Really tense and exciting, I especially love the unexpected arrival of the slann and how it sets up the opportunity for the main character's key decision. And A+++++ for the female pronouns! Only thing I would change would be to have a twist where the hero kills the rat instead of the slann at the last second to make it a happy ending, because I think it would be a more awesome moment of self definition - but that's a personal preference of someone who watches a lot of superhero movies...your darker supervillain origin story is equally valid 7 - Wow, just incredible. Super original and thrilling from start to end, a masterful use of the freedom theme applied to families. I want a movie directed by Ridley Scott. 8 - Nice idea, intentionally not a story though. Shame. Could have been fun to have a little snapshot of a daemon hunting for oxyotl or something. 9 - Nice story, although I'm not sure about your choice to build on Bob's previous work, you'll only encourage him. I think there needed to be a greater crisis for the hero's decision to be more impactful, but otherwise it's good stuff. 10 - Fine. I like that it's contained, doesn't try to do too much. It makes its point. But ...maybe it could have done just a little more? And have been a little less bleak....jeez... 11 - Fun! Who doesn't love a good gladiator story? And well executed, so to speak. I'm not sure I entirely get the ending - I'd have liked to see a greater focus on a major moral choice rather than what I think is a twist...? Unfortunately the author has given themselves away again by their WEIRD and PERVERSE formatting of dialogue lines 12 - very lovely. I like the structure - how each new character's story is really just a continuation of Manfred's story, and...a happy ending! Huzzah!