Contest Lustria Online's Sculpting contest! (Version 2.0) An apology - Contest closed completely

[NIGHTBRINGER]

I understand fully if people are annoyed and I'd be very surprised if anyone on the forum wasn't disappointed or feel let down.
All I can say to those is, I'm sorry, I wish things were different, the only thing I would like to request is you don't chastise me for it because that will not change matters either, beyond fueling my disdain for sculpting.

It's your life my friend, it is up to you to fill it with things that make you happy. Nobody has the right to tell you otherwise. Just because you are a talented sculptor doesn't mean you should be bound to it. If your love of sculpting returns to you then our hobby world will be all the better for it, but if not, that is okay too! Pursue what you enjoy!

 

[Deed525]

Ok, final, final update.

I've edited the main title so that people can see and are made aware of the circumstances.

I'm sorry to have to say this, but it's infinitely preferable than dragging people along more and more.
There will be no models sent out, prizes have been switched to cash payouts.

- I need people to send me their paypal addresses and I'll mail out payments to people.
- I think it only right to give people details as to why, though be warned, it will be angsty.


The thing is, I don't enjoy sculpting any more, even when I have time to do it, I struggle just to force myself to do it.
It's become something I dislike because of all the negativity that has become attached to it over the years:

• All the people who have asked me commissions but offered peanuts in return.
• Numerous individuals in various companies (large and small) who have been nothing short of insulting in their dealings, people who "didn't budget for it", "will be able to pay when money comes through on kickstarter", people who tell you AFTER they receive models that they've had to reduce the amount they pay you because business isn't as good as it was when warhammer fantasy was still alive and well (the latter here was from someone I have called a friend and placed vast amounts of trust in over the years).
• People who cannot organize and or are as vague as possible with details and then get irritable when you press them to give you something decent to work with.

It might sound daft, but try doing something that makes you unhappy, it's only made all the more tragic because it once excited you. The quality of the work you produce, let alone the motivation is pitiful.

The last work (as it were) that comes from me will be from Avatars Of War, I am not allowed to say what it is, or when it will be available.

I understand fully if people are annoyed and I'd be very surprised if anyone on the forum wasn't disappointed or feels let down.
All I can say to those is, I'm sorry, I wish things were different, the only thing I would like to request is you don't chastise me for it because that will not change matters either, beyond fueling my disdain for sculpting.

I am sorry, really I am, I'm not going to make any promises about possibly returning, because I don't know what will happen and I don't want to get peoples' hopes up either.

I’ve always said to people be careful trying to earn money out of something that you enjoy, once something becomes a ‘must’ it slowly stops being someone fun and like you say when the motivation is gone the results and thus your income suffer.
Sculpting is an art form and like all art it’s fueled by inspiration and desire to see something through from nothing until completion - it’s hard if not impossible to do if your heart isn’t in it.

All I can say is that the Warhammer (and other) world would be sad to see your talents lost, so I do hope you find your fuel again and hop back on the horse, not only that - I get a lot of inspiration from watching you well established guys at work, makes me want to do better and push for harder things that I thought I couldn’t do, people like me need you ;D

People here are very understanding, I would be amazed if you got punished - not only that, but prizes tend to come second after simply attending

 

[tom ndege]

Sad to hear that circumstances are pushing you in that direction... I'm somehow experiencing something similar atm... not in the life threatening extrem as you are, but I have to force myself to do anything hobbyrelated after some month of a forced break. (My wife insisted that I take a break cause I spend too much time on the hobby... and the ups and downs on the job site of life don't really help getting back in the mood...)
Guess the step you take is the best you can do in this situation. You need time to forget the troubles and remember the positive things to be free and enjoy your hobby again one day. Wish you all the best.

 

[Aginor]

I'd also like to chime in and say "take your time".
If it isn't fun anymore then it isn't worth the sweat.
I admire your work and of course I hope you come back, but whatever feels right for you, do that.

 

[Rikard]

@tom ndege
I hear you, still was getting grief from my old work place, but I think, now, finally I've put the last nail in that coffin (no bridges burnt, no names slandered, but I will never go back to that place after some of the post-leaving goings on that I've encountered).

@Aginor
Thanks, my thoughts still stay the same, I'm not going to promise anything because I don't want to repeat my mistakes again, I'm cautiously optimistic, but have accepted the possibility I may never pick it up again.

@NIGHTBRINGER
Thank you, I hope so, I really do.

@Crowsfoot
You humbled me with one sentence, I honestly don't know what to say, thank you.

I’ve always said to people be careful trying to earn money out of something that you enjoy, once something becomes a ‘must’ it slowly stops being someone fun and like you say when the motivation is gone the results and thus your income suffer.

I've found it to be more than that, I can remember a time when it was all I lived for, one sculpt at a time, complete it, then move on to the next one, it never got (nor did I ever try to push it) to the stage where it was my only income.

I've not done anything since I last posted, the option of sculpting hasn't even crossed my mind, it may be that once I've had time to let my choices fully sink in, that I'll be fine and things will be like there were when I had no idea what I was doing, or where I was going, kind of like finding yourself on a surfboard riding down a 40 foot wave.

No idea how you got there, no idea how to get off and so you settle on what's immediately in front of you and enjoy the moment without worrying about where, or even how you're going to steer yourself off and in to calmer, safer waters.

The obligation aspect though, is 100% correct, when you do something because you "have" to, or you "promised" to, or even if you feel you're in some way duty bound, then it begins to pull you down.

There are certain sites that I don't and won't use or visit any more, Carpe Noctem was one, after a couple of individuals got very salty when I entered the golden bat contest in the sculpting/kit bashing category, claiming it was unfair. I had some awesome individuals stand up for me, even before I got a chance to reply and I won't forget that kindness.

Bell of lost souls... after the keyboard rage from a sculpting tutorial I did, never again, that place is poison.

Admittedly, the worst part (and I cannot stress this enough) was the decision to go pro, or do it for any kind of financial gain.
I've had some truly horrible experiences, with some utterly vile individuals, if there is a hell I think there's a circle Dante missed that's reserved for anyone acts hurt when they find out they have to pay you for work you've done, those intolerable "We didn't budget for this" individuals.

They are everything that is wrong with freelance work.

I will however say that the one person/company that I "DID" enjoy working for and in many ways helped me far more so than any other, has to be Ed at TrollForged.

No ifs, buts, obligations or coconuts. You did what you wanted to do, at the frequency you wanted to, that was both a rare treat and a joy.